//...strike!...\\

Sunday, July 30, 2006

第一次见面看你不太顺眼
谁知道后来关系那么密切
我们一个像夏天一个像秋天
却总能把冬天变成了春天
你拖我离开一场爱的风雪
我背你逃出一次梦的锻炼
遇见一个人然后生命全改变
原来不是恋爱才有的情节

如果不是你我不会相信
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句
如果不是你我不会确定
朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的胸怀志意我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你你

拖我离开一场爱的风雪
我背你逃出一次梦的锻炼
遇见一个人然后生命全改变
原来不是恋爱才有的情节

如果不是你我不会相信
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句
如果不是你我不会确定
朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的胸怀志意我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你

你了解我所有得意的东西
拆穿我留些意怕我忘形
你知道我所有丢脸的事情
却为我的美好形像保密

如果不是你我不会相信
朋友比情人还死心塌地
就算我忙恋爱把你冷冻结冰
你也不会恨我只是骂我几句
如果不是你我不会确定
朋友比情人更懂得倾听
我的胸怀志意我的有口无心
我离不开darling更离不开你

dotx

//Brandon struck at 8:19 PM\\

Friday, July 28, 2006

today street soccer tournament, lost... sian... sian... sian... sian.... i think i flunked my 'keeper position, although the shots abit hard to save plux that super wet pitch flooded my shoes in a few minutes... =_= now waiting for kun to come online so that can play warcaft 3 funny maps... sianzZzZzZz...

guess everything's over now....

//Brandon struck at 8:56 PM\\

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Today, i cried...

i've exceeded my expectations by clearing all my first 4 napfa stations. mr chay was doing sort of a napfa elimination thingy, such that when anyone of us did not get a D for any stations we will drop out. At the shuttle-run station, our last before 2.4km run, only 4 remained out of 8 who took the test... johnny was pushing me to get a 10.6s, jinyan encouraging me to get a silver since i've cleared with a ADDD, which is not bad considering i cant clear sbj for months...

Then i ran, 11.1s, i threw away the block in disgust. johnny came forward and gave me some tips on running. the other 3, feymun, punhon and marcel all cleared with an A. the pressure is on me to deliver, so that i would go to my final test in 2.4km. i ran, i stumbled, then i walked away. all looked at me in disbelief, 'cos i gave up so meekly. johnny continued to press me to try another time, jeremy too. mr chay also. suddenly i felt encouraged, i felt i could do it. for the third time, i ran. damningly i stumbled alot of times, and the timing was worse. i covered my eyes in disbelief and disappointment....

i slumped onto the ground with acute disappointment, as i saw him taking two blocks and asking johnny and jeremy how to run a proper shuttle run. he had failed the pull-up station and was out before the shuttle run. out of the blue memories of the past year came flooding back,

how we first joined fitness together and i got to know kevin

how we grumbled together about fitness

how he told everyone about my plight after family matters struck, so that everyone can understand and help me together

how we endured through the dry run and the actual camp

how he consoled me when i smsed him on my birthday eve that my dad had only three months to live

how we hanged out with each other almost every school day

how we could talk about almost anything under the sun

how we went through the whole tedious night cycling episode

how we always took turns to walk each other home, he to his aunt's house while me to my home

it was not her fault, damnit. but then again, when had he ever given me a chance to hear his explanation? i couldnt believe everything ended on the day when roland said to my mum how good friends we were on PTM day. or band concert day. for months we had been giving each other the cold shoulder, but no one just understand how i feel inside; it's so undescribable. it's like punhon ignoring johnny, it's like marcel ignoring weijing, it's like amanda ignoring clarrissa, it's like fidelis ignoring serene, it's like serene ignoring michelle, it's like michelle ignoring fidelis, it's like moses ignoring jeremy, it's like jinyan ignoring jamin, it's like joshua ignoring kevin, it's like bernice ignoring natalie... and the list goes on. the person i thought could have been the best buddy i could ever find in SAJC has turned out to be... just a false dawn. no one ever explain why things turn out like this. everyone ought to have noticed it, but no one step in to help us out, be it fitness, be it class S72, be it roland. maybe it was a wise move afterall...

after testing out, he walked away, totally oblivious to a crumpled me slumping at one corner. darryl came to sit with me for awhile and left, we did not exchange any words. i stared at him running with fm for a few rounds. acute disappointment and sorrow overwhelmed me, and i just stared down blankly at the ground. when jinyan johnny jamin and darryl came to me soon afterwards, tears were already flowing down uncontrollably.

they told me, "take it easy, try harder next time." i so wanted to reply,

"i've cried, not because i failed my shuttle run

i've cried, not because i was too stressed up

i've cried, not because i wanted to

i've cried, because i've lost a good friend..."

ps nat pls dont hate and curse him or what, i do not blame him at all...

//Brandon struck at 8:42 PM\\

Sunday, July 23, 2006

And so my 1 year tenure as fitness senior has finally ended... I dunno how the rest of the guys feel but definitely yesterday was a rather sad night, 'cos of how things turned out (i'm not refering to the j1s) thx all the j2s for all their efforts...

i guess i was still very surprised at how i grew up, from a young innocent cute boy last year to a grown more mature (but still CUTE =P) teen. After going through so much last year, i'm really glad there's always a bunch of frens standing behind me pluckin me up whenever i fall during the past 1 year. Thanks again to all of u...

hmmm the programme yesterday is abit messy, the dinner took us almost 3 hours! And the food is still too little, but never mind it's ok i still enjoyed the moment where kevin got smashed on the face with cake by zhengcai, and later on the hair by dominic.. LOL he smelt of cake! Spent around 20minutes washing off the cake on his hair and that poser specs... But ok lah stop laughing at u, it's ur birthday today also.. Wonder how it feels like to be 18, i still got like 5 long months away before i can eat the cake... Wish you all the best in the future...

Then came the ceremony... Eh the MC abit lousy arh, but the presentation is quite ok lah. Then i took over as MC in the second half of the ceremony and took almost 20 photos cos i'm the one giving out the prizes to the j1s and each of them had to take photo muahaha... But nat's video abit biased arh, the princess appeared so MANY TIMES haiyo... zZzZzZz... After which came the special awards segment, all the teachers got their presents, which are wonderfully done boards, really really thx to kevin's creativity, ms lee's board is so scandalous! mr lim's is so funny! J1s also had one board, based on the june camp *specially made by me the night before the ceremony*. But the best surprises came when we gave zhengcai a big surprise when he also received a board *also specially made by me HAHA* chey why he never cry T.T ...

Then all the seniors received a custom-made metallic paper clip with our names on it. Very thoughtful! COnsidering what we gave to our seniors last year it was really uncomparable at all... Thx to all the J1s for making the fitness club so enjoyable.. It will not be an easy year ahead but strive on!! i hope i can be there for the december camp....

It's over finally, ended with (abit of) tears and (lots of) laughters...

//Brandon struck at 12:21 PM\\

Friday, July 21, 2006

"Pass down.please be in school tml by 5.30 to write the thankyou booklet for the teachers.See you all for the last time tml.bring 10bucks also" SAJ Ben

Last time... last time we will be officially members of Fitness club and perharps the last ever msg i will receive from him... Last time... how i hated that word, looking back into the magical moments, it surprised me how people only started feeling good when they thought of the past instead of living good in the present. Memories are always sweet... To think at this point of time last year i was still wondering whether i should remain in Fitness but one year on, how things change....

Fitness family will always remain in my mind forever...

//Brandon struck at 8:33 PM\\

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

1 whole month of boredom, stressing over block test 2, the same old happenings in class, the damning sense of loss everyday in class, the feeling of sastifaction even though it's only a BCE, stepping down from fitness, doing all the things no one wanted to do, the constant urge to mug, trying my best to stay cheerful all day in school, the fretting over the impending NS, jamin stressing not to learn how to swim during NS when i just cant get over the phobia, staring at tons of SJ emails but just dont know what or how to reply 'cos everyone felt so alienated now, family matters ain't helping at all, I just really dont know how to tell anyone...

that i realised i have lost all motivation to do anything, ANYTHING...

PLeasE never ever let me come any closer to press that reset button.....

//Brandon struck at 9:44 PM\\

Monday, July 17, 2006

today in a certain physics tutorial, mr roland lee said,

"Everytime i see him i would be reminded of mr brandon tan...."

does anyone understand how i felt inside at that time?

//Brandon struck at 8:22 PM\\

Sunday, July 16, 2006

I'm not a chemistry nerd like kevin, and so the title got nothing to do with chemistry i assure you...

So troublesome to be a guy, today i just learnt ironing from my mom. Initally i was quite turned off, 'cos our family are really bad teachers. I can still remember (and curse) the time when my bro first taught me how to make a proper tie for my secondary school; practically stood for more than half an hour in front of the mirror enduring the screams (yes, SCREAMS) from my bro. Both my mum and my bro havent exactly had the patience required to be a good teacher. Or so i thought... One student under my bro's tuition improved so well for his studies in Sec4 that his mum was so impressed he got a present in return (i think) ... Err well i'm not sure, but i'm darn pretty sure his mom was very impressed. So be it...

'Cos my dad was having a serious bout of shingles which swelled his right side of the face, and the fact that i'm going NS maybe this yr or next, so ok loh I go learn how to iron clothes, starting with my school uniforms. Luckily my mom never screamed at me or something, if not the ironing wont happen on the clothes XD *ahem* anyway so i tried ironing. Yawn it wasnt too difficult to do anyway, just that i really need to be careful on the way i position my shirt and pants on the ironing board, it doesnt even get CLOSE to being burnt...

Hmm sometimes i wonder, the hot hot thing running around on the clothes, why is it called an iron instead of a brandon? hmmm XD

And so i spent almost 1 hour ironing 3 shirts and 2 pants. So if you see someone wearing rather unkempt clothes and abt crumpled pants, and who needs only 3minutes to get to the school gates... uh ok lah i be more humble, 3 and a half minutes .... that person gotta be me

Today my bro 20st birthday, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

also hope my father can clear the latest stumbling block in his life too, that !#%##$^%$&^ shingles....

//Brandon struck at 8:56 PM\\

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

argh!!

can i stop blushing so easily??

damn!

//Brandon struck at 7:44 PM\\

Monday, July 10, 2006

i cant believe i'm writing this for the 100th post of this blog

my mum n'ver puts her faith on me, no matter how hard i've tried

my mum n'ver trust me with anything, no matter how determined i've tried to prove her wrong

my mum n'ver support any of my decisions....

To hell with everything, to hell....

//Brandon struck at 11:31 PM\\

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

happy 2nd month anniversary....

here comes my first posting of this month, 'cos nowadays was rather hooked onto a campaign map for WC3 that was so fun, i got scolded for staring at the screen for too long by my mum *lol* Block test 2 was so disappointing; i was so darn sure i can get better grades than the ones i received yesterday :S Like all typical students the culprit has to be the WORLD CUP *lol*

Oh ya, i just found out an interesting fact in the World Cup matches. I think the men-of-the-match must go to the camera-men that are covering this event. You know, those occasion shots catching the supporters, whom are dressed like some goons, and then shown on the giant screen placed in front of the playing pitch.

-The first 4 seconds they will be looking bored
-The next 1 second they realise they are on the screen
-The following 2 seconds they will turn around and tell their fans, thrilled, that he/she is on screen

When they turn around, *poofs* the screen will show, again, 22 guys chasing after a miserable ball. Can you imagine the WTF looks on their faces?? XD

Last weekend i was being shown the pure frustration of being disrespected by someone close to you. Gotcha, my mum again... Always offending me with what she said to me 50% of the time, whether unintentionally or not, to such an extend that if i were not to be more tolerant i would have died of stroke+heart attack+asthma+hyperventilation+shock+multiple fractures all around my body... Whether it is critcising my friends, my hair, my messy desk, my darkly lit room, my bad habits, somehow she can describle until i thought a damn asteroid is coming down to earth. But oh well, i've learnt to live with it... Or so i thought; She always makes the wrong assumption on me, always. She thought i would like to have a nice shiny bowl of HERBAL JELLY on such a hot day, 'cos she will never remember i hated such STUFFS. And she ordered a bowl for me WARM (so yucks) When i complained that i didnt ask for it, she casually replied, "YOur brother treating..." *vulgar words censored for the general public, the author shall not be held responsible for the words you think he might have used, although it could have been accurate* So what my brother treated HERBAL JELLY? Big deal... I was so glum no matter how much honey i poured into the jelly, it still tasted bitter...

Also i realised how one's perception on something affects one's behavour to such a large extent. Dont know whether my mum chances upon this *hi mum (waves) thx for dropping by, it's your son's blog mind you....* Recently my dad kept getting fevers for the past 2 weeks or so, and surprisingly (in a negative way) my mum kept refering him as "the sick one" (behind his back, of course) She soon became very pessimistic; forever cannot relax or take jokes from me *hell i trying hard to be a clown so that at least got some entertainment at home, yet i'm dismissed as an idiot*, always nagging at me not to be lazy 'cos there's a sick man at home WTF I was also very vexed by her way of thinking. Seems like she had given up all hopes now... I mean, if she carries on thinking my dad as a sick man, he will FOREVER be a sick man until the cows come home... She always thinks that i dont care about the going-ons under the roof, which is why all the more she should come (Disclaimer: eh joking only arh, dont call her up specially and ask her to come hor, you'll see my head hanging at the pork seller's store near you. This applies to EVERYONE) One's way of thinking is damn important, 'cos it affects everything. Hmm m i sounding like the fitness TIC now? Oh my, cheesepie manx, cheesepie all the way...

Sigh, enough of her, 2 whole paragraphs on her is wayy too much *evil laughters* anyway, tomorrow assembly, i betted on my backside that there will be no haircheck come next morning. PLESE NO HAIR CHECK PLEASE i confirm + stamp + chop sure fail the check, and i'll get a $6 special haircut, manx this school is a cheesepie bugger.. I can never forget how me and ben failed the hair check last year while the johnnys marcels and the weijings always got away scot-free (no offence here haha) I've lost trust in the judgement of the school long time ago loh....

B for maths
E for physics
D for chem perharps?

since bed is my favourite home furniture anyway...

happy 2nd month anniversary...

//Brandon struck at 8:35 PM\\