//...strike!...\\

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Strange, i'm feeling kind of detached from many things i do for this week... Just went out with ct nico and sandy, i came back feeling empty; everything seemed so detached, so unrelated it's just so weird.. For a moment i wasn't lame, i wasn't random, i suddenly lost alot of words to say or to talk cock with.. Zzzz maybe 'cos i just had my 2nd duty of this week, or maybe i bumped into my ex-buddy from SA at the mrt station while waiting for bus to go bugis meet them..

Not really bump lar, just that i saw his backview as he walked past behind me and went down the escalator.. Man i really wished i could ran up and say hi, or he would tap me from behind, but it never happened, maybe not happening anymore.. Can't help it, can i? i single-handedly destroyed the path i walked during and out of SA, i in my worthless arrogance burnt down the bridges of relations with people from SA; it's a mistake i will never recover, and i guess i'll live to regret in times to come... zzzz i'm turning emo elmo again *lol* man but really, i need someone to kick me up in the ass to start painting Zhao Yun gundam before new (nice) ones come out later this year.. ARGHHH but its too complicated

**SCRATCH MY HEAD AND PULL HAIR**

dang i also lost the mood to blog halfway....

//Brandon struck at 11:20 PM\\

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

ahhh feels good to be at home, enjoying the solitude surroundings to the fullest and plain joy of sitting in front of my computer...

frankly speaking its been helleva experience in thailand; there's so many stuffs that we wont have a chance to do in singapore, like hardly when does a big bunch of guys armed with their personal scoop share a tub of water during bathing time? or toilets that ban toilet paper LOL! hmmmm i wouldnt say it's a bad 18 days spent, rather a period full of lessons life itself can teach us during our short lives...

Had this mini exercise that caused us to walk around the rural areas for 'navigation' o.O just as well, i could have had a first-hand experience on the daily lives of a normal thai farmer or a shop vendor.. Sounds corny but i really felt very lucky but kind of jealous at the same time; lucky 'cos i really couldnt imagine myself living their lifestyles but yet jealous of their seemingly content expressions when they look at us.. Ironic, huh? Happiness and standard of living are almost always inversely proportional.. Guess its miraculous to feel happy and content being a Singaporean -.-

If i can use 1 word to describe our platoon during the stay in cresendo, it had to be: greed.. I mean, it's one thing to be excited about new stuffs and experiences, it's another to indulge excessively in ur new finds, be it thai ice creams, imitations, food etc etc.. Often i found myself frowning at some of them in the shops, and the fact that it doesnt help having almost 1000 SAF personels in the camp made the situation a whole lot worse than i could imagine.. Maybe its just me that couldnt stand such behavior, so i kept my tongue still but still frowning nonetheless :S anyway for the exercise i was quite glad for the deployment, not because i volunteered *again* for advance party, but that my section actually chiong for the digging of shellscrapes, all 8 of them completed by 6 guys... OK 7 but 1 of them is a faggot so i hardly consider him a guy let alone section mate... Really tremendous effort by our section; 1 fell sick during advance party deployment; 1 always report sick straight after deployment; another 2 whom are really fit physically but mentally not for deployment, only 1 sgt almond i mean edmund who can camou plants and tonners but cannot dig and me who have a very bad back... OK 1 more faggot... But suddenly that mountain pig never report sick, ron actually completed his own shellscrape *thank god*, wei ming could actually dig 2 purely by himself and chip in in ANOTHER 2 shellscrapes, man oh man was i touched by their efforts... thanks guys for making our last deployment a success..

The r&r was terrible; spending 65% on bus travelling from point A to point B isnt something we were looking forward to before we come thailand but it juz happened to come true... sigh if only i can spend more time at the floating market i could have enjoyed myself more...

anyway what i found the place most interesting are the graffitis left behind by countless people who came, saw and left... jolted down a few of them for this post :S

"Life is something happens while you are planning something else"
how true...

"We are the unfortunate
led by the unqualified
to do the unnecessary
for the ungrateful"
the last sentence hit me hard; how many singaporeans, male or female, dare say they appreciate the efforts of the army? how many of us bother to say hi to the soldiers, like what the thai natives did when we went past, instead of shouting "ORD LOH!!!" ?

C.O.M.M.A.N.D.O

Combination Of Mind, Muscle And Nerve During Operation

or izit

Carry On Many Missions And No Day Off ?? LOL

G.U.A.R.D.S = Guards Usually Are Really Dumb Suckers ???

PR.I.D.E = People Rest I Do Extra
typical singaporean attitude...

and rounding off this post a poem i find it deep in meaning...

"Lies come full circle
I've been in too many cycles
I'm stuck in the middle
Sucked my emotions dry
Til I weep and cry

Lies complete revolution
It's too late to find a solution
It's the end of the line
For whoever you can find
Defend me, build me a moat
Don't wanna be a scapegoat

Fear comes full circle
Couldnt be saved even if there's a miracle
Too late
End of fate
Blessings go
Overtaken by sorrows

Fear completes revolution
Heating up, too much friction
Have to let go
Or else I'll blow
Don't act like you know, show me no pity
Cos' you have no idea how hard it is
Being me"

//Brandon struck at 11:40 PM\\

Monday, September 08, 2008

ok so i'm back from thailand, really kinda once in a lifetime experience down at sai yok camp, invoking lots of observations and thoughts...

i think i shall carry on tmw bah, too messed up to create a nice post anw...

and no i wont say "my first ____" anymore LOL damn u mountain pig hahah

//Brandon struck at 11:47 PM\\