//...strike!...\\

Sunday, March 23, 2008

after thinking so long, so much headaches over the courses, i guess i'll stick to ntu cbc (uh... sounds abit wrong haha) cant believe i doodle over it for so long before deciding not to change my choice, what a waste of brain juices.. i think i'll consider it again at the NEXT a'lvl release, LOL

come to think of it, why i want to change in the first place? maybe i'm scared, really.. i spend 2 years at my army camp in boon lay and now i havta spend ANOTHER 4 yrs at ntu, which is at boon lay again?! *groans* and i wasnt really sure, 'cos for prospects after studyin chem & biochem it's kinda hard unless i excel in my studies, which again is kinda hard.. and also cos of.. ah oh wells i havent thought of stayin in hostels, i stayed in for 2 yrs and i gonna carry on for another 4 yrs *groans*

then again, will i have a future in this course? or am i studyin it just for the sake of studying, get this 'general' degree and go to the outside world for a totally unrelated job? man, the future is too uncertain to think about now, i guess i just concentrate on enjoying life as it is now...

who knows? tomorrow might not come after all

xD

cheers for today

//Brandon struck at 4:39 PM\\

Thursday, March 20, 2008

finally gotten my forklift license, wonder if it will be of any use for the future...

today the tnp reports about the celebrity blogger who ruffled quite a few feathers (PS walau my english still not bad after so long in army MUAHAHA) in the netizens.. but the rocker does have a point: bloggers dont blog about their real personalities! this term... what is it.. "Internet persona" arh? something like an alternate personality that is used in internet and especially, blogging...

hmm, then, whats mine?

elmo's new younger brother, emo?

lolz

but really, it's time to start thinking about the future... sigh headache headache and more headaches....

//Brandon struck at 10:08 PM\\

Thursday, March 13, 2008

whew, it needs a lucky break to end the dumb night duties at east coast park.. looking back i cant imagine surviving 6 nights... it's 7 days since i basked on sunlight, that's how bad the weather is nowadays..

really hate it when i'm alone sitting down looking at the sea, ur mind never fails to wander far far away.. you think about alot of things; you think about your past, you think about all the mistakes you've made.. you remembered the promises you broke, you saw the faces of the various people you let down for the past 20 years.. you realised you can never let someone down again cos he's already gone.. you tried hard to cheer up, but the endless pain and regret surfaced to eat you up in the end.. whats left of you is just a emotionless soul living for the sake of living..

then i realised a fact i tried to run away for the past four months or so: the brandon of the past is gone.. the brandon at mshs, the brandon at mshs sjab, the brandon at cjc 1t37. the brandon at sajc 05s72, the brandon at saints fitness, the brandon at bmt and now the brandon at 30sce.

they are all gone

looking at the sago seed in my wallet, i swear i will rebuild myself.. i want to get strong.. i want to be the one encouraging others, not vice versa..

fuck, i really hate it when i end up like this everytime....

//Brandon struck at 10:13 PM\\

Sunday, March 02, 2008

man, having lots of thoughts for these few days...

cant help but to hum to the tune of this song yet again

一盏黄黄旧旧的灯

时间在旁闷不吭声

寂寞下手毫无分寸

不懂得轻重之分

沉默支撑跃过陌生

静静看著凌晨黄昏

你的身影失去平衡

慢慢下沉

黑暗已在空中盘旋

该往哪我看不见

也许爱在梦的另一端

无法存活在真实的空间

想回到过去

试著抱你在怀里

羞怯的脸带有一点稚气

想看你的看的世界,

想在你梦的画面

祇要靠在一起就能感觉甜蜜

想回到过去

试著让故事继续

至少不再让你离我而去

分散时间的注意

这次会抱得更紧

这样挽留不知还来不来得及

想回到过去

思绪不断阻挡著回忆播放

盲目的追寻仍然空空荡荡

灰蒙蒙的夜晚睡意又不知躲到哪去

一转身孤单已躺在身旁....

//Brandon struck at 8:47 PM\\